Embracing the Unexpected : January 2015

       April 2005 I convinced my mom to stop by Pet Land to look, just look at puppies. I should have known better my family can not just look at puppies. As I walked into Pet Land the first puppy I saw was this crazy white fluff ball braking uncontrollably. I went up to the box and it started chasing my hand all around the glass. I looked at my mom and said, "can we take this one out to play with?" She wasn't thrilled with the idea of more than looking at puppies, but couldn't help but want to pet the fluffy thing. So their we were in the little play box with this Tasmanian devil of a dog. He ran from wall to wall over us biting at everything he could. I was in love. I had a hard time leaving the little guy in his box as we left the store. My mom's first words,"No." I laughed and said but Abby needs a new friend if Deablo goes to a new home." We spent the ride talking about it, and I could tell she was in love with him too. She finally told me I have to ask my dad. So of course I did. His response, "I don't know, ask your mother." Now at this point in my life I had 2 dogs my sister had 1 and my mom had 1 so honestly I don't think one more was that big of a deal, right? Well perfect answer from my dad, so I went back to my mom and told her it was up to her. I showed her I had more than half of the money we needed to get him and she decided she would pay the rest. The next day we went back and that crazy fluff ball was still there and we brought him home. I think they were happy to see him leave since he never stopped barking.
       Chase join my family 4/20/05. He was so lucky to be as cute as he was since Chase has been the worse puppy I have ever had. He chewed everything in sight, shoes, chairs, clothes, leashes, etc.... and being a Samoyed barked all and I mean all of the time. I loved him though, he was so cute and such a sweet heart when he wasn't destroying my things. He fell in love with my girl Penny and our main man Gus and learned from them very well how to be a good house dog.
       Jump forward to his 2nd Christmas with us, by this time we were all going fairly deaf due to his barking and had tried everything we could thing of to stop his barking. So Chase's first Christmas present ever was a bark collar that shocked him in increasingly strong pluses as he barked. Let me tell you, I was not happy about it, but this training tool was heaven sent! I used it with him for about 2 years. It was incredible I was finally able to really work with this goofy teenage boy and begin to train him well.
       Chase soon became the greatest uncle ever as Abby had a litter of puppies we were not expecting. Chase took care of them all the time and kept them very occupied. They would steal his toys so he would then grab it back then sit on it on his bed. He would try and collect all of his toys and theirs and sit on them and guard them.
      Chase also surprised us all when my mom began to take him to see my Grandma as she was getting worse with Alzheimer's and he was this perfect angel. He would calming just sit with her and follow her around. I was so proud of my boy. He also was amazing with babies. When my first nephew was born and came to visit Chase would not leave his side. Once Isaiah was starting to stand and trying to walk Chase would be right there letting Isaiah grab all his fur and pull till he could stand up. Chase helped him stand and walk!

    Chase was lucky enough to come to college with me and live with my first 2 roommates and I. He was perfect, he helped me meet new people and kept me happy when school got tough. After the 2 hardest years of my life (where he wasn't living with me) I snatched him back up and moved back to Point to live by myself. Chase saved me, he was the best roommate, kept me moving, and again helped me meet lots of new people. Including the friend who helped me get the job out here!
    I was such a proud mom to see how many other people fell in love with my boy, He helped many friends who were missing their puppies back home. He also helped one of my friends get over her fear of dogs, now she is getting her first puppy this year!
     I took the job in Alaska only under the circumstance that Chase and Lucy had to be able to come with me. I never felt alone with them around and could definitely not leave them for 5 months!
For the last year and half Chase has been by my side every day of work and has gone camping, fishing, and hiking with me. He has made Alaska not feel so lonely and always made me feel loved.

2 weeks ago I informed everyone Chase had lymphoma. He had one of the rarest kinds and it usually takes a dog within 4-6 weeks chase and been fighting this for 5-6 months now. I started him on some meds to try and help him feel better since it was too far along to really battle. They began to work well, almost too well. His lymph nodes reduced in size by over half as long with his white blood cell count.

My last posted informing of the amazing news that I was accepted into vet school was not exactly how I wanted to tell everyone. I began writing that story a while ago but had to use it that night. About 20 mins after the call for being accepted Chase took a turn for the worse and went into shock from the meds. I rushed him to the vet and they were able to get him stable and I brought him home that night unsure if he'd make it through. So that last post was tough to get up that night.

The week that followed was very tough I was at the kennel by myself caring for all 60 dogs while Dee and Peter were out in Bethel for the race. I kept Chase by my side every day to watch him closely. Annabelle slept outside for her first few nights so he could rest calmly inside. He seemed to be improving from the shock and I took him with me to watch the Packers play last weekend. I restarted the meds Sundays evening as the vets thought he could handle them again.

Monday started just fine I completed all the morning chores leaving Chase inside as his breathing was not very good that morning. When I was done and let him outside I noticed he was not looking good at all he couldn't make the walk back inside. I called the vet and determined he had gone back into shock again. He had fluid building up in his lungs.
The look in my babies eyes broke my heart into a million pieces. He was telling me he couldn't fight anymore but that he wouldn't stop fighting for me and I knew I had to let him go. I called the vet back up and told them I was bring him in because I thought he needed to be sent to heaven(I hate the term put down). I had to carry my baby boy to the car and it took every ounce of energy he had to lay down by my seat so I could drive with my hand on him.

This was the longest and hardest drive of my life. I spent the time thanking him for being amazing, for being my best friend, and for all the amazing things he has done for me. Thanked him for saving me and loving me so unconditionally. About 10 minutes away from the vet I felt my baby stop breathing and his heart stop pumping. I couldn't stop I knew I had to get to the vet. Once at the vet I climbed in the back and held my baby boy. I think he knew how hard it was for me to make that decision so when I finally told him it was okay to go be with our girls he finally stopped fighting and saved me from having to make the decision myself.

I just picked his ashes up yesterday and so grateful I had friends willing to be there for me.

The lost of a pet at least to me is devastating. Chase was my everything, my rock, my greatest friend. Nothing feels the same here and I am surrounded by constant memories of him.

I stay strong knowing my baby would hate to see me hurting and would hate it even more if I loved or care for his friends here any less.

I read somewhere once dogs have shorter lives than us because they are put here to help us through a certain time in our life and once we learn all we can from them it is time for them to move on. Chase taught me so much. He taught me to be silly and not care what anyone thinks, to love with every ounce of my being, that its worth going up to a stranger and meeting new friends, to have an enormous amount of patience with children and puppies, that the inner child in you should shine through and growing up does not mean you have to grow old. Chase taught me how to fight for what my heart wants, to never give up, and when I was sad or lonely he was there to remind me I am never alone. He was by my side through some of the biggest changes I've had to make in my life and I do not think I could have come out as strong as I did without him.

I think most of all though my baby was waiting and fighting for me. He knew about my dream to be a veterinarian. I believe he was fighting so hard because he knew I would get in but couldn't leave me until I believed it too. My boy started to go down hill 20 minutes after the phone call which was just enough time for me to call and tell my family I got in.

To write this hurts yet makes me smile, I try to hold strong onto his beautiful smile and goofy attitude. I am so thankfully for Annabelle that he help me raise her and now she seems to have learn many of his loving tricks to make me smile. He has passed on many great things to the dogs still in my life.

Thank you to all my friends and family who have helped care for him when I needed help and who have loved him and smiled with him during his wonderful life.

Here's to you Chase, may you run free of pain in Heaven with our girls Penny and Abby. You will forever live on in my heart. and your ashes will be laid to rest on the trail of my biggest dream with our girl Abby.